I would have titled the post “Attack of the Clones.” But I don’t want to get sued by George Lucas.
Recently, I signed up to Facebook. Well, people kept bugging me about it and I have been dragging my feet because I was not sure when I would have the time to do anything over there and I was worried about privacy issues. Then I received an email invitation from someone who wanted to become my friend on Facebook. Blushing furiously while amazed anyone would want to become friends with a . . . um . . . not-quite-right-on-her-rocker type gal like me, I joined up. And like any person who signs up to a new social site on the Internet, I did the one thing in exploring my interesting environment.
I searched for myself.
Admit it, everyone. The moment you got Internet access, you Googled your own name to see what would come up because you wanted to find out if those incriminating pictures of you attending that or . . .
Um, never mind what I was going to say. I searched for myself in the friends section and came up with pages of other people named Michelle Hickman. Even more disturbing was that SEVERAL OF THESE GIRLS LOOK EXACTLY LIKE ME.
I am serious. If any of you are on Facebook, do a search of my name and look at our faces without the hairstyles. They look like me - not kind of or sort of. THEY LOOK LIKE ME!
I have been cloned, massively cloned. This explains all the people who ask me if I’m so-and-so a person from so-and-so a state or country. Actually, I’ve been asked often if I were a certain woman down in the Dominican Republic.
The government has cloned me. It is a conspiracy. They have created numerous carbon copies in their efforts to . . . uh . . . well, do I really need a logical reason for this? We are talking about the government. When have they ever needed a logical reason for anything?
Wait! Maybe I am the clone? Ha-ha! No. I could not be a clone. I have watched those sci-fi movies. Whenever the clone figures out that she is the clone, the government men always try to silence her in a way that is excruciating and involves a lot of electrical current.
Huh? Why did my keyboard suddenly spark - ZZZZZZT! AIEEEEEEE!