Tuesday's Tips

Hmm . . . I guess you are wondering from the title what this post is about. Well, you remember back around the beginning of June when I mentioned I MIGHT start another “Ten Stupid Things” list. What? You don’t? Shame on you! Where were you living at . . . in a cave . . . under a rock? Oh, you might not have been visiting my place during that time. Hold on, let me get my head-slap of ignorance going. *slap* Now I will remove my foot out my mouth, apologize profusely for assuming the worst, and recap what I mentioned those many weeks ago.

I had done a “Ten Stupid Things a Kid Will Do” list (the title is longer but I don’t feel like typing out the whole thing) during May and June. It was amusing. It was fun. It . . . got on my last nerve.

I guess what got to me was that I wrote all of them back-to-back and posted them back-to-back. Never again! I craved to post something different, but I kept with those stories until the end. And it was at the end when I talked about doing another list: “The Ten Stupid Writing Mistakes I Make.” If you want to see the titles of the list, well, you have to go visit that post. I’m not breaking it down here. I have too much other stuff that I’m sharing today.

So, yes, I have decided to do the list because it is driving me NUTS! The stories are sitting in my gray matter, lurking, and jumping out whenever I get to a juicy part of my (almost finished - Yippee) manuscript. I have to get the stories out. I MUST . . . FOR MY SANITY’S SAKE. (Hey, keep those snide remarks to yourself.) But, this time, I am only dedicating one day to the list. Tuesdays. Sundays I might make into a photo day, sharing amusing anecdotes while posting the corresponding picture. Thursday will be STORY DAY. Yes! Woo-hoo! Shake my tail feather . . . shake my tail feather. Um, yeah. I guess you can tell just how much I love writing stories. You’re getting them free here - no, I don’t know why your bank account dwindles every day that you see my blog. Go check your credit report. It’s not my fault. Honest!

Okay, I guess a few people might be saying, “Why is SHE making a writing list? SHE doesn’t have any publishing credits. SHE is not a literary agent. SHE is not an editor. SHE isn’t an author or even a teacher. SHE shouldn’t be doing this!”

Well, aren’t YOU snotty! Go somewhere else if YOU don’t like it!

Are they gone? Good! Nobody needs such negativity just because someone might not have the accolades I mentioned above. This doesn’t mean a person can’t see some common flaws in their own writing and want to share it with others so they do not fall into the same bad habits. Lighten up, people!

My “Ten Stupid Writing Mistakes I Make” list, coming to a computer screen near you (probably the one you are using now). Check your local listing for the day and time, which I already mentioned the day and the time has been about the same for all my posts. Be there or be a snotty person who can’t lighten up. Stay tuned!

No! Wait! This is not the end of the post. When do I ever post something short? I got some interesting things to show you. Really! You will enjoy it.

See, I was thinking about stories and the reason I write. The idea that got me interested in taking a pen and a piece of paper and to make swirly ink images forming sentences. I have noticed a lot of people will dedicate their experiences to a certain book, which is fine. There are many stories out there sparking the imagination and the urge to see if a writer has the obsession to create their own novels - yes, it is an obsession. An addiction. If you do not feel that crack-head junkie urge to skip a meal, or several showers, or a good night’s sleep to get your fix of penning down a chapter, then you are DEFINITELY PURSUING THE WRONG CAREER.

Anyway, I will now blow your freaking mind away concerning what experience became the driving factor, the urge, to set my butt down and write to my heart’s content.

Television.

Yes, you heard right. The boob tube. The idiot box. The couch potatoes’ best friend. It was tv that got me interested in writing, or rather something I had watched on the glowing screen when I was a kid. I will give you a few hints. For those people my age and older, you will probably recognize what I am talking about immediately.

Saturday cartoons.
Three minute spots in-between commercials.
ABC (the TV station)
Conjunction Junction, what’s your function?

Did you guess “School House Rock?” Congratulations! Give the lucky one a stuffed bear! Those little educational shorts in-between the regular-length cartoons taught me the meaning of sentences, how to put them together, and how those sentences convey your coherent thoughts. (Again, keep those snide remarks about my blog to yourself!)

In dedication to those long ago memories, here are some videos. “Conjunction Junction,” and the one that must send editors and agents screaming in sheer terror and despair but was my absolute favorite when growing up - “Lolly, lolly, lolly . . . Get Your Adverbs Here.” Enjoy!

Conjunction Junction




Lolly-Lolly, Adverbs, SCREAM!