Age progression transgression

Lately, I’ve been thinking of my younger years. Whenever I’m in the pondering mood, I search for photos to further jog my lagging memory. I don’t have many photos. Yet the ones I do have sometimes create entertaining moments.

I was looking at four different photos. Instead of wondering when they took place and what I was doing at the time, I began analyzing my own thoughts - or rather the first thoughts that popped into my head. Then I began wondering what other people’s first thoughts would be.

Someone’s first thoughts: Awwww, look how cutesy-wutsey-putsey she was with those chubby cheeks! Ubba-wubba-lubba . . .

My first thoughts: I am so doing the Sugar Ray Leonard pose with those curled fists. And look how my tongue is out like that. Who has the bad breath because I’m ready to punch out the person for spewing their garlic funk while talking all nonsense on me? Also, will someone please pass me a comb! That hair style isn’t working for me.


Someone’s first thoughts: Oh look! She’s playing with a cute little baby doll while sitting all nice in the chair. How precious!

My first thoughts: Huh, I wonder where that handstitched puppet is now? I remember placing my hand through the slot in the back where I could make the head and the arms shift around to fool people into believing it was a real baby. I would imagine them leaning over for a better look and then smacking them in the head with the plastic rattle before stealing their wallet.

Someone’s first thoughts: This picture must have been during the early ‘90s. There are the famous teenage puffy bangs. At least she still has those chubby cheeks. By why on earth is she wearing those large eyeglasses?

My first thoughts: What is with those large bugeyed glasses? Egad, and what was I thinking on wearing those puffy bangs? And am I squirreling nuts inside those cheeks? I can’t believe this was my graduation picture. Someone please shoot me.

Someone’s first thoughts: Look how much she has matured from those earlier pictures. She seems more relaxed with herself. The chubby cheeks are still there.

My first thoughts: I am so about to work the Sugar Ray Leonard pose because someone’s breath is reeking up the joint. Wow. I have a big forehead. Maybe I should do some nice puffy bangs.

Wait! Did someone just drop their wallet on the floor? I wish this camera would flash so I can grab the money. Crap, someone else picked it up. Someone please shoot me. Never mind. I want to finish eating the nuts in my bulging cheeks. Have to go now.