Thursday, December 3, 2009

Love Affair

It started as a tiny little thing. We would meet in the mornings, in front of the mirror as I still had my bathrobe on. It was just once a day, a little peck on the chin. Then it happened more frequently. I waited with anticipation while watching the two lips near. They skipped down, coolness against my warm skin, caressing at certain spots. Then the lips pressed together and lifted, as I experienced the brief moment of loss, of separation, like the tiniest pinpricks of pain.

Yet, despite the pain, I came back for more.

It took time away from my daily schedule. I would brush fingers across my chin in remembrance. Then my will power would weaken. I dashed into the bedroom for our meeting. Always there for me, always eager to please, never turning me down for what I desire.

The cool lips. The pressure. The joy.

What more could I have ever asked for? This affair doesn’t require much from me. I don’t have to put on any airs. I don’t have to impress anyone. It doesn’t matter if I’m wearing baggy sweat clothes, a tight dress, or nothing at all.

All the other one wants from me are a mirror and a waiting chin.

I have become obsessed with a secret affair. I have become obsessed with my secret lover and must tell the world how I feel. I must show the world who my lover is and how they fulfil me.



It’s a woman’s greatest dread (unless you’re part of a carny freak show) to look into a mirror and see a straggly goatee forming on your chin. The urge to pluck . . . pluck . . . pluck . . . those hairs is irresistible. And my tweezers always meet me with kissing lips.

My secret lover.

26 comments:

  1. You must have written this for all the rest of us chin pamperers.

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  2. Ah, pleasure and pain - two sides of the same coin, sometimes.

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  3. I'm not a woman but it would take me weeks to pluck the hairs from my chin.

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  4. You're such a tease.. I mean tweeze! ;)

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  5. Judith: Not really. I wrote this while plucking my chin hairs and thinking, "Oh crap! I need to make another blog posting this week."

    Suldog: Yes, sometimes the two things are inseparable.

    Travis: I wouldn't recommend it with you.

    Hilary: Ha! you're always good for some fun... I mean pun. :-)

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  6. Loved this one Michelle !! I can sooooo relate to it. :o)

    ~ Ruth ~

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  7. Okay, now I know there's something wrong with you. A post about being in love with tweezers. Wow. Words escape me.

    Heh heh, just kidding. This was pretty inventive to say the least.

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  8. R&G: See! I'm not the only person going through this.

    Eric: Inventive, or desperate to think up something to post? Oh, how the line is blurred...

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  9. Bwwwaaaahhhaaa! I thought this was serious. Girl, you are too funny. :-D

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  10. DH: Me? Serious? HA! Not here, or at least not usually.

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  11. lol. thanks for the chuckle this morning...and congrats on the POTW mention!

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  12. Brian: Thanks! And thanks for stopping by!

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  13. OMG! I laughed, I cried, I peed! Wonderful post...congratulations on Hilary's Post of the Week!!! Loved this...
    Sandi

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  14. That was awesome! LoL! I couldn't help but chuckle when I realized you were talking about tweezers! :) Great post!

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  15. This was a wonderfully hilarious twist in the tale!

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  16. Sandi Mcbride: I didn't know my post created so many emotions! LOL! Thanks for stopping by!

    Meeko Fabulous: Thanks! I love doing the twist endings. It's my calling card. Thanks for stopping by.

    Ladyfi: Thanks! I'm glad you liked it.

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  17. oh how well i understand this ritual and the affair!

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  18. Lime: I'm not the only one? Why that two-timing worthless piece of metal! When I get me hands on him...

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  19. Over from Hilary.

    My friend was just commenting on this exact thing! Pretty sure the two of you share the very same lover. :-)

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  20. Ah, there is nothing like laughter born in sheer empathy!

    I swear to you, I nearly wrote a post about how tweezer's were the greatest invention since the wheel, just last week, and why?

    Yup, the dreaded chin hairs. I know I don't even have it all that bad, or as my MIL told me, "Oh just wait until after menopause!"

    Whee?

    Wonderful, funny and easy to relate to. Congratulations on the POTW.

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  21. TSannie: My tweezers is such a two-timing cheat. I'm finding out he's going around seeing everyone. Lol! Thanks for stopping by.

    Land of Shrimp: Wait until after I hit menopause? But... I'm dealing with it NOW?!? Oh, I knew I should have taken that carney gig and grown the beard out. Thanks for stopping by and commenting.

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  22. You made me laugh!!
    my eyesight is so blurry lately that I live in fear of missing the chin hair
    and one giant one that springs out of my neck like a Greek god

    I spend a lot of time feeling around for them

    thanks for making me feel less alone!!

    congrats on POTW

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  23. Too funny....congrats on POTW mention! Thanks for the smile!

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  24. Dianne: OMG! Those dreaded neck hairs right under the chin. Hate them so much especially when they grow out and curl. *shudder* Thanks for stopping by!

    smiles4u: Glad I could brighten your day. Thanks for stopping by!

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  25. Yes, I know! Congrats on POTW mention.

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